Redhead Jokes

laughing jester

A lot of these redhead jokes or versions of them have been circulating for quite a while.....and well, I debated about posting a page with the jokes because I didn't want to demean redheads, offend anyone, or propagate the redhead stereotypes.
-- I mean, I love redheads!
My daughters are redheads!

(Now that I think about it, you could probably substitute 'redhead' for 'menopausal woman' instead....since I've been there, done that...)

Anyway, just want to pass on a chuckle or two. So, I decided to post a few of the 'clean' jokes. I know they're out there, but I won't post any of the 'adult' redhead jokes.

If you have a CLEAN redhead joke you'd like to submit, just go to my CONTACT ME page. I'll post at my discretion.


REDHEAD JOKES


man with jokes list

Q. How do you get a redhead's mood to change?
A. Wait 10 seconds.


Q. What do you call a redhead with an attitude?
A. Normal.


Q. What do redheads make for dinner?
A. Reservations.


Q. Why do guys date blondes?
A. All the redheads are taken.


Q. How can you tell when a redhead has been using a finicky computer?
A. There's a hammer embedded in the computer monitor.


Q. Why aren't there more redhead jokes?
A. Someone made the mistake of telling them to a redhead.


Q. What is the difference between a redhead and a terrorist?
A. You can negotiate with a terrorist.


Q. How do you get a redhead to argue with you?
A. Say something...


Q. What’s safer: a redhead or a piranha?
A. The piranha. They only attack in schools.


Q. Why do redheads really like their hair color?
A. It does the same thing for the men it does for the bulls.


Q. Why didn't Indians scalp redheads?
A. They knew better.


Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A redhead.


Q. How do you know when your redhead has forgiven you?
A. She stops washing your clothes in the toilet bowl.


Q. How many redheads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. One -- she holds the bulb while the world revolves around her.


Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a barracuda?
A. Nail polish.


Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a pit bull?
A. The pantsuit.


Q. What's black-and-blue and lies on the sidewalk?
A. A guy who tells too many redheaded jokes.


Q. Why is it better to date a blonde than a redhead?
A. You can ignore a blonde safely.


Q. How do you remember a redhead's birthday?
A. Forget it once.


Q. How is a redhead like a tennis racquet?
A. They're both high-strung.


Q. What do redheads and razor-wire have in common?
A. Handle both with care.


Q. What do you call a redhead guy who works at a bakery?
A. A ginger bread man!


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  • Seen inscribed on a tombstone: "Beneath this stone lies the guy who told that last bad redhead joke."

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  • Redheads are just blondes with high blood pressure.

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  • Only two things are necessary to keep a redhead happy:
    One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.

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  • If you love a Redhead, set her free...
    If she follows you everywhere you go, pitches a tent in your front lawn and puts your new girlfriend in the hospital, she’s yours.

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    WHAT A REDHEAD REALLY MEANS WHEN...

    -- A redhead says: It's your decision.
    -- She really means: The correct decision should be obvious.

    -- A redhead says: Do you like this recipe?
    -- She really means: You better get used to it.

    -- A redhead says: Yes.
    -- She really means: No.

    -- A redhead says: No.
    -- She really means: No.

    -- A redhead says: Maybe.
    -- She really means: No.

    -- A redhead says: I'm not yelling!
    -- She really means: Yes I am! This is important!

    BLONDE-BRUNETTE- REDHEAD JOKES
    (These are kind of a 'blonde joke' but have redheads in then, so posted them anyway...Not meaning to offend any blondes out there either, but I think it's okay to laugh at ourselves a little! I could have easily substituted 'blonde' for 'gray hair' here!! LOL...)


    This redhead, brunette, and blonde were talking about space travel. They started talking about which planet they'd go to if they could travel in space.
    -- The redhead said, "I'd go to Mars, because it is red, like my hair."
    -- Then the brunette, not to be outdone, said, "Well I'd go to Saturn, because it's got all those groovy rings."
    -- Finally, the blonde spoke up. She said,"I'd go to the Sun."
    The redhead and the brunette laughed!
    -- The redhead said, "Number one, the sun is not a planet."
    -- "And number two," the brunette finished, "you'd burn up."
    -- The blonde said, "Well duh! I'd go at night!!!"

    * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

    There's a blond, brunette, and a red head. They walk into a store and try to rob it but the cashier calls the cops. They run outside and look for a place to hide. They see a barn and then run inside where they see 3 potato sacks. They each get inside one. When the cops come in and look around, they see one of the sacks move and kick it. The brunette goes, "Woof, woof" and the cop thinks she's a dog so he moves on. He kicks the next sack and the red head goes, "Meow, meow" and he thinks she's a cat so he moves on. The cop goes to the last sack and when he kicks it the blonde goes, "Potato, potato."

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    A blonde, brunette and a redhead had a breaststroke swimming race across the English Channel. The brunette came in first, the redhead came in second, and the blonde never finished. When the blonde got in the lifeboat she said, "I don't want to be a tattletale or anything, but the other two used their arms."

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    Q: Why are blonde jokes so short?
    A: So redheads can understand them

    If you're a redhead, how do YOU feel about "redhead jokes"??
    Let me know and I'll post them on this page....just go to my "Contact Me" page to pass on your thoughts.

    -- YOUR COMMENTS --

    "I really think your redhead jokes are funny and you are right -- it won't hurt to laugh a little about ourselves!! lol"
    (Kelsey, USA)

    "I really like your red-head jokes. I am a red head and I have never heard ANY jokes about redheads. The funny thing is that all of them are true. My husband agrees as well."
    (Terri, USA)

    "They are not even that good. I mean even if I didn't have red hair, it wouldn't be funny."
    (A.Redhead, Australia)

    "I think the redhead jokes were awesome! They are actually true!"
    (Alisha, USA)

    "I'm a redhead and I don't find these offensive...I mean just like there's blonde jokes and not all blondes are stupid... not all redheads are 'hot' or 'hot-tempered' either....The red heads that take these offensively are hot-tempered and match the jokes perfectly. ;) ---!"
    (Kaitlin, USA)

    "I'm a redhead and I love these! I think they're funny and not offensive at all!! :PP "
    (Kaitlin, USA)

    "I am a redhead and love the jokes."
    (Barb, USA)

    "Love the red head jokes...I haven't heard a lot of red head jokes that didn't offend me, but I tell you what...there may be some funny jokes on your page but they are all true lol...very true... Gotta love bein RED !!!"
    (Britnee, USA)

    "I love the joke page! It's hilarious, and they are true about me. ;)"
    (Lindsay, USA)

    "Well I'm a real redhead girl. I find some jokes about us are kinda mean and nice."
    (Ashton, USA)

    "Well I'm a redhead and I love these jokes. I love redhead jokes! But I got to admit I do get mad easily :D. Sometimes XD."
    (Janeth, USA)

    "I think the jokes are hilarious and yes I am a real redhead. I have my dad to thank."
    (Catherine J., USA)

    "I am a natural redhead and I find these jokes quite hilarious, so true...and frankly, we all get a lil hot tempered ;)) "
    (Stephanie, USA)

    "I Love the jokes! Keep em coming!"
    (Desirae, USA)

    "My friend and I think these are hilarious and we both have red hair. Keep em coming!"
    (DaniandEmily, USA)

    "I am a natural redhead and the jokes gave me a good laugh because they are all true, even though visually we "stand out in a crowd" we just do not get the attention that blondes receive."
    (Kate, Australia)

    "I think your red head jokes are soooo funny - and so true. I'm a redhead myself and my friends all agree with these jokes."
    (Rachel, USA)

    "I'm a redhead. I just read these jokes out loud to my hubby after I read them first - I laughed out loud both times! My hubby got a good laugh too (I let him). :) I agree with my fellow redheads that we need to be able to laugh at ourselves & this was a good forum to do so. Thanks to the loving dad of two redheads for posting these. :)"
    ( Terry, USA)

    [Note: Thanks Terry, the jokes are actually posted by me, Deb, a loving 'mom' of two redheads! -- glad you guys enjoyed the jokes! :)]

    "I love the jokes -- my mom says that they are true!"
    (Peyton, Canada)

    "I am a redhead and I have been described as difficult, fickle, crazy, over-sexed, hot, sexy, scary when angry, and I've a penchant for throwing back a few whiskeys. In my case, the stereotypes are true."
    (Chris, USA)

    "I am a redhead and we are not at all bad tempered, but if we ever met you will get a damn good scolding from me !"
    (Erin, Ireland)

    "One ought not tell jokes about "gingers".....coz genetic defects aint funny. :) Cool website. "
    (Jay, Australia)

    "I am a red head and I find these really funny and true :) "
    (Syndi, USA)

    "I think they're funny except the one that said why are blond jokes so short and the answer was so redheads can understand them. I'm a natural redhead and I understand blond jokes."
    (Madison, USA)

    "I've been told "Better dead than red on the head". I responded, "That can be arranged."
    (Joe)

    "My friend and I love these jokes and I am a redhead. She is a blonde that acts like a redhead. She is very easily made mad... OUCH I JUST GOT SLAPPED!!!!!"
    (Anna, USA)

    "Don't say, 'Oh I love redheads' then put jokes that demean and contribute to the stereotypes people propagate. Do you have a page with 'Oh I love African Americans' with jokes???"
    (Bob, USA)

    "Hi, I'm a redhead and laughed thru all dem jokes... Probably cos most are true!!"
    (Orla, Ireland)



    ...More redhead jokes to come as I find them!.... Thanks for visiting!!

    Again, if you have a CLEAN redhead joke you'd like to submit, visit my CONTACT ME page to share -- I'll post at my discretion.

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