Redhead Jokes
 A lot of these redhead jokes or versions of them have been circulating for quite a while.....and well, I debated about posting a page with the jokes because I didn't want to demean redheads, offend anyone, or propagate the redhead stereotypes.
-- I mean, I love redheads!
My daughters are redheads! (Now that I think about it, you could probably substitute 'redhead' for 'menopausal woman' instead....since I've been there, done that...) Anyway, just want to pass on a chuckle or two. So, I decided to post a few of the 'clean' jokes. I won't post any of the 'adult' jokes about redheads.
 If you have a CLEAN redhead joke you'd like to submit, just go to my CONTACT ME page. I'll post at my discretion.
Q. How do you get a redhead's mood to change?
A. Wait 10 seconds.
Q. What do you call a redhead with an attitude?
A. Normal.
Q. How can you tell when a redhead has been using a finicky computer?
A. There's a hammer embedded in the computer monitor.
Q. Why aren't there more redhead jokes?
A. Someone made the mistake of telling them to a redhead.
Q. What is the difference between a redhead and a terrorist?
A. You can negotiate with a terrorist.
Q. How do you get a redhead to argue with you?
A. Say something...
Q. What’s safer: a redhead or a piranha?
A. The piranha. They only attack in schools.
Q. Why do redheads really like their hair color?
A. It does the same thing for the men it does for the bulls.
Q. Why didn't Indians scalp redheads?
A. They knew better.
Q. What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A. A redhead.
Q. How do you know when your redhead has forgiven you?
A. She stops washing your clothes in the toilet bowl.
Q. How many redheads does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A. One -- she holds the bulb while the world revolves around her.
Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a barracuda?
A. Nail polish.
Q. What's the difference between a redhead and a pit bull?
A. The pantsuit.
Q. What do redheads make for dinner?
A. Reservations.
Q. What's black-and-blue and lies on the sidewalk?
A. A guy who tells too many redheaded jokes.
Q. Why is it better to date a blonde than a redhead?
A. You can ignore a blonde safely.
Q. How do you remember a redhead's birthday?
A. Forget it once.
Q. How is a redhead like a tennis racquet?
A. They're both high-strung.
Q. What do redheads and razor-wire have in common?
A. Handle both with care.
Q. Why do guys date blondes?
Q. All the redheads are taken.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *Redheads are just blondes with high blood pressure. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *Seen inscribed on a tombstone: "Beneath this stone lies the guy who told that last bad redhead joke." * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *Only two things are necessary to keep a redhead happy:
One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it. * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *If you love a Redhead, set her free...
If she follows you everywhere you go, pitches a tent in your front lawn and puts your new girlfriend in the hospital, she’s yours. | WHAT A REDHEAD REALLY MEANS WHEN... -- A redhead says: It's your decision.
-- She really means: The correct decision should be obvious. -- A redhead says: Do you like this recipe?
-- She really means: You better get used to it. -- A redhead says: Yes.
-- She really means: No. -- A redhead says: No.
-- She really means: No. -- A redhead says: Maybe.
-- She really means: No. -- A redhead says: I'm not yelling!
-- She really means: Yes I am! This is important! |
(These are kind of a 'blonde joke' but have redheads in then, so posted them anyway...Not meaning to offend any blondes out there either, but I think it's okay to laugh at ourselves a little! I could have easily substituted 'blonde' for 'gray hair' here!! LOL...)
This redhead, brunette, and blonde were talking about space travel. They started talking about which planet they'd go to if they could travel in space.
-- The redhead said, "I'd go to Mars, because it is red, like my hair."
-- Then the brunette, not to be outdone, said, "Well I'd go to Saturn, because it's got all those groovy rings."
-- Finally, the blonde spoke up. She said,"I'd go to the Sun."
The redhead and the brunette laughed!
-- The redhead said, "Number one, the sun is not a planet."
-- "And number two," the brunette finished, "you'd burn up."
-- The blonde said, "Well duh! I'd go at night!!!"
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *There's a blond, brunette, and a red head. They walk into a store and try to rob it but the cashier calls the cops. They run outside and look for a place to hide. They see a barn and then run inside where they see 3 potato sacks. They each get inside one. When the cops come in and look around, they see one of the sacks move and kick it. The brunette goes, "Woof, woof" and the cop thinks she's a dog so he moves on. He kicks the next sack and the red head goes, "Meow, meow" and he thinks she's a cat so he moves on. The cop goes to the last sack and when he kicks it the blonde goes, "Potato, potato." * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *A blonde, brunette and a redhead had a breaststroke swimming race across the English Channel. The brunette came in first, the redhead came in second, and the blonde never finished. When the blonde got in the lifeboat she said, "I don't want to be a tattletale or anything, but the other two used their arms."
If you're a redhead, how do YOU feel about 'redhead jokes' ?? Let me know and I'll post them on this page....just go to my "Contact Me" page to pass on your thoughts.
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